It took soul-searching, or rather “skinning” myself to get down to the layers of pain in my hard heart. I think I finally peeled off all the bandages that I had wrapped around the wound in my heart, and I came to the thorn…the nugget of truth about what was hurting so bad. I am […]Read Post ›
I am happy to say, I was able to get back into my blogs here at WordPress, after a lengthy absence. I was unable to remember my sign in information for the longest time, but finally I was able to get back here!!! My sister blog, Out of the Gutter Art, has been languishing also, […]Read Post ›
So much suffering in this world, that anything I may go through just pales by comparison. Just pales. A night out for friends at a club, a few drinks. A few laughs. Dancing. Happy, young, upwardly mobile. Beautiful. Did I tell you how beautiful they all are? Faces shown on smartphones, tv screens, computes. They […]Read Post ›
Let me start this blog off by saying that I am not a health care professional, nor am I licensed in any form of mental health capacity. All I am is a person in pain, having lost a dear loved one, and who also happens to suffer from Bipolar Disorder. So, in a sense, that […]Read Post ›
this is tough, this being me. i say all kinds of euphemistic things: endure, be brave, be faithful… a memory stirs, i am back to missing you. i am glad you are not suffering. i am glad the pain is gone. but here i am left, wondering. how do i carry on? my life is like […]Read Post ›
I am feeling a bit more positive than I was in this morning’s post, Dad got up for a while around 2pm, I laid on the couch dozing on and off, keeping my eyes and ears on alert. He fell on Wednesday, big gash on his head, poor Pops. It happened while his caregiver was […]Read Post ›
Profoundly Alive. Zestful. Happy. Hopeful. Forward Looking. Lifted up. Elated. Active. Alive. Aware. Absolutely Positive. I am these things, I am all of them. I must believe that I am. Loveable. Loved. Free. Truthful. Beautiful. My heart healed, my wings mended, my joy complete. I am now the person I always wished I could be. […]Read Post ›
This is the part that hurts. Feeling a vague feeling of guilt, knowing that this ebbing manic period has left devastation in my life again, not sure yet what it is. I feel like I’m coming down from a drinking/drugging binge, coming out of a blackout. Sick and hurting, depressed and angry at myself. I […]Read Post ›
all the fear, for all those years spent broken, spent frightened spent. awake now, knowing how feel inside, heal outside heal. would you know? how could you know never told you, afraid to hold you afraid. perfect plans laid, got the debt paid freedom? slavery? freedom. traveled long way, got back today missed home, […]Read Post ›
We love our pets, don’t we? When you have no children, and you are trapped for 10 years in a house with elderly, sick and dying parents your pets come to have a whole new meaning to you. I always was loopy about them, and as time has gone on my family and I have […]Read Post ›
