Feeling at War with Myself

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I have been languishing here, letting myself fall off the edge of sanity for a while. Is it physical?emotional?spiritual? No, not spiritual, for I feel close to my Creator. I just feel diminished, somehow, like my life’s blood has been watered down. Perhaps when the rainy season ends I will blossom again. Till then, my friend, bear with me…

 

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Categories: art, Bipolar Art, Bipolar Disorder, Childhood sexual abuse, Chronic Depression, Denial, disability, Flashbacks, gratitude, grief, Handicapped, identity, insomnia, mental illness, metamorphosis, artist, love, change, recovery, rebirth, mothers, out of the gutter, pain, painting, promises, Psychiatrist, PTSD, re-purposed, Real Life, Recovery, Healing, Sex abuse, sexual assault, Shame and Guilt, shih-tzus, sobriety, TherapyTags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Susan T. Martin

I am an Artist, Poet and Author. A Survivor of Violent Sexual Abuse and Rape, I have lived thru Severe Domestic Violence, Twenty Three years of Addiction and Alcoholism, Family Dysfunction, Chronic Pain, Dependence on Opioids, and 2 Venomous Snake Bites...I have Been Stabbed, Shot at, Tied to a Tree and Choked Unconscious. A Quarter Horse Rolled on Me, as did a Lawn Tractor. I also Wrecked a Harley into a Tree! I also have PTSD and Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder, and spent my 18th birthday in a Locked Psychiatric Ward. I am so much more than this: I feel like a tiny seed that sprouted in a desert, and now has grown into a Passion Vine. My Art is my Voice, Screaming, Crying, Praying, Loving, Laughing, Healing- all in Riotous Color...

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